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Singles + Single Parents: Staying Sane While Staying Home During the Coronavirus

We are living in strange and unprecedented times.

Currently, the coronavirus (COVID-19) is spreading across the world. People are staying home and isolating, and not always by choice. In fact, this global pandemic is changing daily the way many of us live, work, worship and play—or don’t.

Schools are closed. Sporting events are cancelled. Movie theatres and restaurants are closed. Even church doors are shuttered (but thankfully many houses of worship provide online services).

It seems like much of American life is closing down —at least for the next few weeks—so we can “flatten the curve” and help slow down the spread of this virus.

Now What?

How do we live in this unexpected, isolated new world?

For one thing, many of us are now working from home or not working at all.

For singles, that presents some new challenges. After days on end without people contact, you may feel lonely and isolated. Staying at home can be hard because we are social beings; we need human interaction.

You can’t go out to eat or to the movies—or even to church events—since most everything is closed, and when you do venture out (say, to the grocery store) you’re supposed to be “social distancing” (staying at least six feet away from other people in public).

Single parents have their own challenges now too, with school closures. Because of the virus, kids are at home all day long. For some moms and dads, this can cause stress and anxiety. But it can also lead to creative “teachable moments” as parents are now the teachers.

More time at home can also lead to a closer and better family life as we consider again what is most important because our focus is changing.

If sports and theatres and restaurants and well, basically all activities are shut down, it forces us to do other things. Perhaps better and more bonding things. That is my hope for families.

Staying Sane and Strong

During this time of uncertainty and isolation, with more time at home, how can you find peace and squelch fear? Help others? Use your time wisely?

Here are six (6) key ways to stay sane and strong during the virus crisis—and throughout life:

1) Keep up your health.

By now, you’ve heard all the basics about staying healthy and keeping up your immune system so you are less likely to get the coronavirus: Wash hands for at least 20 seconds. Avoid touching your face as much as possible. Drink water. Eat healthy foods. Clean your cell phone often.

If you’re feeling lonely or isolated, call or text a friend or FaceTime with someone during your lunch hour to feel more connected. Shore up your emotional health as well as your physical health.

2) Get a handle on fear.

It’s normal to feel fear during these precarious times. No one knows how much the virus will spread or when it will stop. Feeling fearful is only human. It’s what you do next that makes the difference between living in fear or finding peace.

Will you choose worry or trust God?

Peace comes as you remember what God has done in the past. Think of how he has helped you through tough times before, and believe that He will help you now.

Fear says, “I cannot handle this situation.” Faith says, “But God can.”

Remember Peter in the Bible, the one who walked on water when Christ beckoned him to come? When Peter’s eyes were on Jesus, he stood firm. Eyes on the storm around him, he sank.

Likewise, we can keep our hearts tuned to what Christ says, looking to Him, not freaking ourselves out by looking at the turbulent circumstances around us.

Even though you have no idea what’s going to happen, inner strength can replace uncertainty when you shore up God’s truth inside of you.

Read encouraging Bible verses. Listen to praise and worship music. Pray. Keep your mind set so it doesn’t wander.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10

3) Feed your mind.

It’s essential to keep perspective when news sources are bombarding the public with a constant stream of stories about the virus. Yes, it’s important to stay informed. But don’t overwhelm yourself by watching too much.

Instead, feed your mind with God’s unchanging truth from His Word, the Bible. This is your weapon against fear, anxiety, depression, loneliness and other feelings.

Truth leads to peace. Here are some comforting verses:

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear…”
Psalm 46:1-2

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:6-7

Greg Laurie, pastor of Harvest Church in California posted a meme on Facebook recently:

“Turn your panic into PRAYER, turn your worry into WORSHIP, turn your fear into FAITH.”

4) Be the church.

A building is not “the church,” we are. The people who go to church can “be the church” to those in need at such a time as this.

Ask your family members, friends, neighbors, church family, and others if they need anything. You can drop off items on their doorstep to keep your social distance.

Donate to food banks (by drive-up, if possible). Keep giving to your church and other ministries (online or send a check in the mail).

Find creative ways to help others. As Christ-followers, we can be a light in a dark world. We can bring hope to the hopeless. And be a helping hand to those in need.

Lead with love. Love your family—even when they’re hard to handle. Love your friends, even though you may not see them as often now. Love changes everything.

5) Use your time wisely.

Spending more time at home can be both a challenge and an opportunity.

If you find that you have more time on your hands in this season, consider how you will use it. Maybe you need to catch up on rest. Or, start writing that book you’ve always wanted to write. Playing music, reading, and maybe even learning to cook with YouTube videos can help pass the time.

Since many nursing homes and assisted living facilities are on lockdown and they cannot have visitors in person right now, you could write a senior a card or letter. Like, a real snail-mail letter.

I heard that during another pandemic, the 1665 Plague of London, Sir Isaac Newton invented calculus. No pressure to invent something, but it made me think that this time away from other distractions could very well produce some good and creative things.

Here’s a great resource for those of you who want to watch helpful, biblical teaching videos on things relating to dating, sex, love and relationships. Author and speaker Brian Kluth has a free resource on those topics, “God’s Road Map for Single and Single-Again Adults.”

6) Get perspective.

Dr. James Dobson offers these wise and comforting words of hope on the coronavirus outbreak. You’ll definitely want to read that.

During this time of change and crisis, you may have to “do without” for a time. Do without hugs when you can’t visit those you love. Do without going out to eat or to movies or watch sports. For some, sadly, it’s doing without an income, not just paper goods or cleaning supplies. (And we can pray for those in need.)

Hopefully, that will lead to a greater appreciation for the people and things you do have. During this time of isolation and closures, choose gratitude. Gratitude leads to joy.

Finally, I believe that this time of virus and isolating will end. It will not last forever. And we will be stronger because of it.

In the meantime:

Stay calm.

Trust God.

And, wash your hands.

Prayer

“Lord, we ask for your help and healing in this time of uncertainty. Please stop the spread of this coronavirus (COVID-19) around the world. Help it to cease soon! Help those who are sick to heal. Help the first responders and medical professionals to stay safe and healthy as they treat others. Provide the supplies they need. And a cure. Be with those who are working at home or in the workplace to be productive, and not feel isolated or lonely. Help us all to stay healthy and keep our eyes on You, not the changing circumstances around us. May we be strong and better people for this, and may this virus crisis end soon. We trust in your goodness and faithfulness. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.”

Drop me a line below. How are you handling “more time at home” while people are isolating because of the coronavirus (COVID-19)?

RESOURCES

For more hope and inspiration, check out these books by Jackie M. Johnson:

Praying with Power When Life Gets Tough
Power Prayers for Women
Prayers with Purpose for Women

Photo credit: bongkarn thanyakij from Pexels

Best Quotes from “The Sacred Romance” by John Eldredge

Recently, I had the honor of meeting one of my favorite authors, John Eldredge. You may know him from his runaway bestsellers such as, Wild at Heart, The Sacred Romance or Waking the Dead.

Author, counselor and teacher John Eldredge, president of Ransomed Heart ministries, is the real deal. He was present, interested in what I had to say, and sincerely warm and friendly.

While he has a new book coming out in 2020 (which I will write more about in coming weeks), it’s Eldredge’s first book (written with his friend, Brent Curtis) that captured my attention and changed me nearly two decades ago: The Sacred Romance: Drawing Close to the Heart of God.

I want to share some of his most profound and life-changing quotes. My hope is that they will resonate with you, make you think—and encourage you in your faith walk in profoundly positive ways.

Quotes from “The Sacred Romance” by John Eldredge

(Below, the John Eldredge quotes are in bold ,and my comments are in regular text.)

From childhood on, something or Someone has called us on a journey of the heart. It is a journey full of intimacy, adventure, beauty, and more than a little danger.

The Sacred Romance calls to us in our fondest memories, our greatest loves, our noblest achievements, even our deepest hurts. The reward is worth the risk. God Himself longs for us, if we are but willing…

Eldredge reminds us of God’s invitation to come—and find life and meaning and greater love.

You were made for something more.

God is drawing us to Himself. If only we would listen.

Sadly, many of us get busy with life and activities—even worthwhile things—and we never seem to have enough time to deepen our relationship with God.

We cannot hear this voice if we have lost touch with our heart.

Eldredge reminds us of our most important journey ever—a journey of redemption. A journey “into God’s heart, our true home.”

Our own stories and longings are interwoven with a wooing of God to draw us to Himself.

To hear his voice clearly.
To follow Him.
To rediscover who God really is—and how deeply and well He loves us. Accepts us. Forgives us. Cherishes us.

This journey is a quest toward God.

He [God] loved us before the beginning of time, has come for us, and now calls us to a journey toward him, with him…a journey of heroic proportions..a journey of the heart.

Our Story is written by God who is more than author, he is the romantic lead in our personal dramas. He created us for himself and now is moving heaven and earth to restore us to his side…he seeks to free our hearts from the attachments and addictions we’ve chosen.

Wow! That’s some kind of love.

There really is something wonderful that draws our heart; we are being wooed…

And we are faced with a decision.

Will we leave our small stories behind and venture forth to follow our Beloved into the Sacred Romance?

So, we take the journey to know God more and come closer to His heart. And we learn how he demonstrates that love for each of us, often in ways unexpected.

God is always romancing us through the simple daily things:

a sunrise,

the smell of coffee,

the perfect conditions for jogging,

sending us encouragers at the right time, all manner of things,

but Satan is trying to derail those efforts with lies like, you are worthless, you will never fit in, you have not got what it takes, you are an inconvenience, basically anything that makes you doubt God’s goodness to you, the same lie he used in Eden.

Of course, there has to be conflict (and I hate conflict).

But in stories and in real life, there are struggles and challenges that prevent us from getting where we want to be, things that hinder us in the journey.

The Accuser stepped in with a subtle, deadly stream of thoughts: “…Things will never change, God doesn’t care for your heart…This is who you really are: unlovely and unlovable.”

Thankfully, the story does not end there. The One who loves us most has defeated the Accuser, and is persistent in his pursuit of us—of you, of me.

…We are truly God’s Beloved, the Bride he is preparing to reveal in all her beauty before the courts of heaven.

And throughout the journey, we come to know God in a deeper and more profoundly closer way. And we are forever changed.

Transformed by love.

The Sacred Romance calls to us every moment of our lives…

invites us through the laughter of good friends,

reaches out to us through the touch of someone we love.

We’ve heard it in our favorite music,

sensed it at the birth of our first child,

been drawn to it while watching the shimmer of a sunset on the ocean.

Something calls to us through experiences like these and rouses an inconsolable longing deep within our heart, wakening in us a yearning for intimacy, beauty, and adventure.

This longing…fuels our search for meaning, for wholeness, for a sense of being truly alive.

And the voice that calls to us in this place is none other than the voice of God.

***

Resources

Power Prayers for Women by Jackie M. Johnson
Praying with Power When Life Gets Tough by Jackie M. Johnson
When Love Ends and the Ice Cream Carton Is Empty by Jackie M. Johnson

How to Find More Peace in Your Life

Why is peace so elusive?

Perhaps it’s because we forget to replenish our source of peace in the busyness of daily living.

Regardless of our circumstances, we can live a life of peace when we find contentment in Christ and draw near to Him.

What does that mean, really?

Here’s a good example: The moon absorbs light from the sun, and reflects the light. Likewise, you can bask in the light of God’s Son and absorb His truths.

Then you can become a man or woman who reflect His joy and peace to the world.

You can have peace because God has a plan.

A life of less anxiety is truly possible when you trust God and transfer the outcome of the decision to Him.

Instead of thinking “it’s all up to me” and “I have to make this happen” you can surrender your fear and doubt to the Lord believing He will take care of you—and provide a course correction, if needed.

Talk to God in prayer.

Tell him how you feel and what you need. Ask Him to give you wisdom to know what to do, and supernatural strength, to do what needs to be done.

You don’t have to do this hard and messy life on your own. God is with you, and He is for you. Ask for His help and provision, His protection and peace.

TRUST is the key. God will take care of you.

Be at peace.

***

Key Bible Verses

“A heart at peace gives life to the body…” ~ Proverbs 14:30

“Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.” ~ James 3:18

“You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.” ~ Isaiah 26:3

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” ~ John 14:27

Powerful Prayer

Lord, I don’t want to be anxious. I want to be a person of peace. Help me to keep centered on you and not my problems or the storms of life around me. Calm me, and help me to find my security and contentment in You, the One who loves me most. Still my inner heart so I can be peaceful in my thought and actions. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Additional Resources

Power Prayers for Women by Jackie M. Johnson
Praying with Power When Life Gets Tough by Jackie M. Johnson
When Love Ends and the Ice Cream Carton Is Empty by Jackie M. Johnson

Check out these other related blogs…

How to Be Happy Now

How to Forgive When You Just Don’t Want To

You’re hurting. Mad. Sad. Stunned that someone you care about has hurt you so greatly. Is it really possible to forgive—especially when you just don’t want to?

I mean, he hurt you—or she offended you. Why should you forgive? The other person should pay for their transgressions, right? They don’t deserve to be forgiven after what they have done.

I’ve learned a lot about the topic of forgiving others, especially after going through heart-wrenching breakups in dating relationships.

One guy I dated for nearly two years moved out of state for his job and forgot to tell me we broke up. Seriously. When I called him, the phone just rang and rang. I never got an explanation about why he ghosted me.

Boyfriend, girlfriends or friends may do things to cause us pain. Parents or family members may say mean things. Even total strangers can cause us grief. We’ve all been hurt before.

After one awful breakup, I started looking for answers about how to deal with the pain and how to forgive. I had some misconceptions about forgiveness, and I learned some life-changing things in the process.

Four Big Ideas

Here are four (4) big ideas I’ve come to learn about forgiveness:

  1. Forgiveness is not forgetting about what happened or acting like everything is okay. It doesn’t mean that you condone what happened, agree with it or like it.
  2. Holding onto past pain not only continues to hurt you,it can also block you from moving forward. Pent up pain turns into bitterness, resentment, and emotional poison works its way into other areas of your life.
  3. Forgiving someone is not “letting them off the hook.” You are not overlooking the offense or excusing it, and you are definitely not letting the offender off the hook for his or her words or actions. Instead, you’re putting that person on God’s hook, so to speak, and trusting God to deal with it fairly because He said He would.
  4. Forgiveness is possible.You can forgive others because the One who loves you most, God, has first forgiven you—and because He asks us to. He will give you the power and strength to do what you cannot do on your own.

How does that work?

As you release the person who’s wronged you to God, He ensures justice is served; not you.

“Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.” (Romans 12:19)

Our perspective changes when we realize what God has done for us: He freely extends unconditional love and forgiveness to us, His children. And in the light of the mercy He’s shown us, we can extend the hand of forgiveness to others.

Forgiving others is possible as you:

  • Acknowledge you have been hurt. “I have been wronged.”
  • Receive God’s forgiveness. “I have been wrong, too. I need forgiveness.”
  • Choose to forgive. “I’m wrestling with why I should I forgive him?”
  • Release to God in prayer—and forgive. “Because God has forgiven me, I will forgive him.”

“For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” ~ Matthew 6:14, 15

Forgiveness isn’t easy. That’s for sure. Give your situation to God to handle. Choose to forgive others because God has forgiven you. He will help you through it.

And then go live in emotional freedom and peace!

Prayer
Lord, You know what’s happened in this relationship. I bring before you (say the person’s name) and all the hurt and pain he (or she) has caused me. In my own strength I cannot let go, but I ask for the power of the Holy Spirit to help me to forgive. Blow a fresh wind of healing in my life and release the resentment, bitterness, and feelings of offense. Help me to forgive because you have forgiven me. Empower me to have mercy on others in Your strength, knowing You are a God of justice. I ask for Your mighty power to work in me and through me. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

QUESTION: Have you had a hard time forgiving someone who’s hurt you? What did you do to move forward? Let us know in the comments section below.

Additional Resources by Jackie M. Johnson:

Life After Loss: A Lesson from the Redwood Tree

The redwood trees in Northern California have a secret. These centuries-old giants—three hundred feet or taller—have a unique ability to withstand fire.

In addition to their high branches and the dense bark that provides protection, redwood trees lack a flammable resin on their bark (something most other types of trees have).

It renders redwood trees nearly fireproof.

Even if the heat of a forest fire becomes so intense that it burns the tree, the roots often survive because they are buried in the cool moist soil. After a fire, and in time, new growth begins to appear.

Triumph after tragedy.

You may have suffered unspeakable losses. You may feel as if your life will never be the same. But as with the redwoods, new life—a different life—can sprout again.

From the black, fire-charred remnants of disaster, green leaves begin to sprout and the forest regrows.

As you get back to the roots of truth, God’s unchanging truth about you and your situation, about who He is and all the amazing things He has done, regrowth comes in your heart and life too.

The heart is surprisingly resilient.

From the ashes of loss and pain, uncertainty and frustration come fresh hope. New perspective. A chance to begin anew.

Tragedies can undo us, or they can make us stronger and better people.

Feed your mind with truth: You are God’s child. He loves you. He is with you. Always. God is your comfort and your strength. All things really do work together for the good, even when you cannot feel it or see it right now.

Trust God for new hope and healing.

***

Photo by Jordan Pulmano (Unsplash)