Browsing Tag

help

How to Deal With Difficult People

 

Are you dealing with a difficult person right now? 

Whether it’s in your home or workplace or someplace else, it can be emotionally exhausting. 

Maybe you have a co-worker who’s an arrogant know-it-all.

Perhaps your spouse constantly nags you like a woodpecker on an oak tree. 

Could it be that you have to live with the hurtful words of someone who is critical and manipulative?

You have choices
I’m sure you have your own list of things that annoy you—like people who ignore, interrupt or insult you. 

No matter what happens or how people treat you, you can choose how you will respond. 

You can respond defensively and angrily, or kindly with respect and tact. You can change the subject. You can walk away. Or, you could choose not to argue and take the high road. 

You have choices.

Of course, it’s natural to be offended when someone hurts our feelings, but what we do with that offense—whether we hold it inside and let it fester, or release it—makes all the difference.

Here are some helpful ways to deal with conflict and strife from the difficult people in your life:

First, pray and ask God how to best handle your challenging situation. God may take you out of it, or He will sustain you while He creates an exit. Or, knowing the creative God we serve, He may just do something else.

Jesus had some remarkable things to say about dealing with difficult people. He said: love your enemies. And often, our human nature wants to do otherwise. 

Sometimes the most loving thing to do is to “speak the truth in love” and say the hard things, with kindness and tact, but also with boldness and truth.

Keep perspective. Hurting people hurt other people. They may have issues in their life that make them act the way they do. 

Of course, past pain in someone else’s life doesn’t excuse bad behavior in yours. Knowing that, however, may help you to better deal with the situation. Often the problem is not about you, it’s about them.

Communicate with tact. Don’t blame or accuse, instead say, “When you (describe their action), I feel (describe how you feel). “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). 

However, there may be times when, despite your best efforts, you may need to leave the room and handle the situation another time so anger can diffuse.

Ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” Maybe you are learning deeper depths of patience through a challenging relationship. I remember my own lessons years ago in learning to stand up for myself, when someone was treating me poorly.

Most importantly, pray—for the person who’s annoying you, and for grace and strength in your response. Your prayers are powerful and effective! 

Philippians 4:13 states, “I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” 

Know that you cannot do it in your own strength. You may want to get angry and lash out; you may think revenge is the only way, but God can empower you and enable you to reply in God-honoring ways.

Coping with difficult people is part of life. It isn’t always easy, but our all-powerful and loving God can give you the strength and wisdom for your challenges.

Have hope .Trust God. Take action. And watch what happens.

You may just be positively surprised.

POWERFUL PRAYER
Lord, I have a challenging person in my life right now, and sometimes I don’t know what to do. You tell us to love our enemies, and my human nature wants to do otherwise. Will show me how and give me the strength to do so? Pour out your power in me to show kindness, even when it is not merited by another person. Give me discernment to know when to face a situation and when to walk away. I choose the high road of love; protect my heart. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

 

The righteous person may have many troubles,
but the LORD delivers him from them all;
Psalm 34:19


For more help and hope from Jackie M. Johnson, check out “Praying with Power When Life Gets Tough

Help and Hope for “Life in the Time of the Coronavirus”

So how are you doing with the “stay at home” order? Working from home? Teaching your kids? Social distancing? COVID-19 coronavirus affects us all.

If you need some helpful resources to stay sane and spiritually strong, I’ve compiled a good read for you.

Here is a list of my most recent blog posts to help you navigate the stormy waters and daily life of “Life in the Time of the Coronavirus” as we know it now.

Read on and feel free to share with others. (Click the title to read the entire post.)




Help and Hope for “Life in the Time of the Coronavirus”

1. How to Handle Fear about the Coronavirus. In these days of uncertainty, you may be feeling fearful or anxious. What’s going to happen? Will I be safe? What about my loved ones? We need to know the truth, so we can be set free from fear. Includes helpful Bible verses and prayer against fear.

2. Staying Sane While Staying Home During the Coronavirus. This is written for singles and singles parents, but it will help anyone who reads it to get a fresh infusion of hope, practical tips and increased trust in God.


3. Prayer Against COVID-19 (Coronavirus). Join me in praying for the COVID-19 coronavirus to STOP! May is pass over us and end soon. Prayer is powerful because God is powerful.

4. How to Know For Certain You’ll Go to Heaven – Discovering God’s Love and Amazing Grace. Do you know with certainty that if you died today that you would go to heaven? That, my friend, is the most important question you will ever answer in your lifetime. Read on and get the certainty you need.

Lastly, I believe we will get through this time. And, we will become stronger and better. Circumstances do not make a life; it’s HOW we handle them that makes the difference.

Our times are in God’s hands. Be at peace.

Jackie M. Johnson

How to Handle Fear About the Coronavirus

In these days of uncertainty, with the worldwide coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic, you may be feeling fearful or anxious.

What’s going to happen?

What is the truth—what is real news and what is fake news?

Am I safe? Are those I love safe and healthy?

When our safety is threatened—physically or emotionally—we are rightly afraid. Our bodies are equipped with an inner alarm to signal something is not right in order to protect us from harm.

We are human. And it’s OK to feel afraid. But…

In addition, we need wisdom to discern if the thing we’re fearful about is a real fear or a false fear—and what to do about it.

For example, if you hear an unfamiliar noise in the middle of the night, you might be afraid someone is trying to break into your home.

But once you discover it’s really just the wind blowing tree branches against a window pane, your mind can rest again.

We need to know the truth, so we can be set free from fear.

Some people are afraid to fly.

Some fear being alone.

Others are afraid of not having enough money, like when you’re laid off from your job or bank account is nearing zero balance.

You have a right to feel fear.

It’s what you do with your feelings of fear that makes a difference. You can choose to live in worry and doubt, or you can choose to trust God in every situation. Peace can replace anxiety. Fear subsides.

How do you do that?

Pray

To begin, pray. Talk to God about your fears. Jill Briscoe once said, “Courage is fear that has said its prayers.”

God is always here and near. He listens. He cares. And He is always at work, even when we cannot see it or feel it.

Remember

Then, remember what God has done in the past—for you and for others.

Recall how He has seen you through hard times before, and believe that He will again deliver you from difficult circumstances. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you do what you cannot do in your own human strength.

Fear says, “I cannot handle this situation.” Faith says, “God can.”

Bask in Truth

Trust that even though you can’t see now how it’s all going to work out, God does. He knows. And He is still in control come rain or shine, or virus or anything.

Shore up inside you the truth about who God is as protector, provider, helper, and healer. He is stronger than any force that tries to come against you. And He is your peace in the storm-tossed world.

Listen to the words of hope and comfort from Dr. James Dobson on his Family Talk broadcast today, April 2, 2020.  He shares his thoughts and concerns about this worldwide pandemic, and also offers encouragement.

God is whispering to you, “Will you trust me?” Will you choose to trust that the One who loves you most will take care of you?

The choice is yours.

Our times are in His hands.

***

Key Bible Verses

“So we say with confidence, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?’” ~ Hebrews 13:6

“For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.” ~ 2 Timothy 1:7

“But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.” ~ James 1:6

“For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent and set me high upon a rock.” ~ Psalm 27:5

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” ~ Isaiah 41:10

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” ~ Joshua 1:9

Powerful Prayer

Lord, I need your help and protection. Rescue me from this fear and doubt swirling around me. I ask you to quiet my stormy emotions. Help me to believe that You will take care of me—and all of my difficult circumstances. Keep me safe in the comfort of your love and strong power. You can do anything! And I need you right now. Turn my darkness to light. Help me to move from fear to confidence, from timid to trusting. Give me courage to move forward, one step at a time with You. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

He is another prayer specifically to pray against the coronavirus, COVID-19.

Additional Resources

Power Prayers for Women by Jackie M. Johnson
Praying with Power When Life Gets Tough by Jackie M. Johnson
When Love Ends and the Ice Cream Carton Is Empty by Jackie M. Johnson

Photo credit: Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

Singles + Single Parents: Staying Sane While Staying Home During the Coronavirus

We are living in strange and unprecedented times.

Currently, the coronavirus (COVID-19) is spreading across the world. People are staying home and isolating, and not always by choice. In fact, this global pandemic is changing daily the way many of us live, work, worship and play—or don’t.

Schools are closed. Sporting events are cancelled. Movie theatres and restaurants are closed. Even church doors are shuttered (but thankfully many houses of worship provide online services).

It seems like much of American life is closing down —at least for the next few weeks—so we can “flatten the curve” and help slow down the spread of this virus.

Now What?

How do we live in this unexpected, isolated new world?

For one thing, many of us are now working from home or not working at all.

For singles, that presents some new challenges. After days on end without people contact, you may feel lonely and isolated. Staying at home can be hard because we are social beings; we need human interaction.

You can’t go out to eat or to the movies—or even to church events—since most everything is closed, and when you do venture out (say, to the grocery store) you’re supposed to be “social distancing” (staying at least six feet away from other people in public).

Single parents have their own challenges now too, with school closures. Because of the virus, kids are at home all day long. For some moms and dads, this can cause stress and anxiety. But it can also lead to creative “teachable moments” as parents are now the teachers.

More time at home can also lead to a closer and better family life as we consider again what is most important because our focus is changing.

If sports and theatres and restaurants and well, basically all activities are shut down, it forces us to do other things. Perhaps better and more bonding things. That is my hope for families.

Staying Sane and Strong

During this time of uncertainty and isolation, with more time at home, how can you find peace and squelch fear? Help others? Use your time wisely?

Here are six (6) key ways to stay sane and strong during the virus crisis—and throughout life:

1) Keep up your health.

By now, you’ve heard all the basics about staying healthy and keeping up your immune system so you are less likely to get the coronavirus: Wash hands for at least 20 seconds. Avoid touching your face as much as possible. Drink water. Eat healthy foods. Clean your cell phone often.

If you’re feeling lonely or isolated, call or text a friend or FaceTime with someone during your lunch hour to feel more connected. Shore up your emotional health as well as your physical health.

2) Get a handle on fear.

It’s normal to feel fear during these precarious times. No one knows how much the virus will spread or when it will stop. Feeling fearful is only human. It’s what you do next that makes the difference between living in fear or finding peace.

Will you choose worry or trust God?

Peace comes as you remember what God has done in the past. Think of how he has helped you through tough times before, and believe that He will help you now.

Fear says, “I cannot handle this situation.” Faith says, “But God can.”

Remember Peter in the Bible, the one who walked on water when Christ beckoned him to come? When Peter’s eyes were on Jesus, he stood firm. Eyes on the storm around him, he sank.

Likewise, we can keep our hearts tuned to what Christ says, looking to Him, not freaking ourselves out by looking at the turbulent circumstances around us.

Even though you have no idea what’s going to happen, inner strength can replace uncertainty when you shore up God’s truth inside of you.

Read encouraging Bible verses. Listen to praise and worship music. Pray. Keep your mind set so it doesn’t wander.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10

3) Feed your mind.

It’s essential to keep perspective when news sources are bombarding the public with a constant stream of stories about the virus. Yes, it’s important to stay informed. But don’t overwhelm yourself by watching too much.

Instead, feed your mind with God’s unchanging truth from His Word, the Bible. This is your weapon against fear, anxiety, depression, loneliness and other feelings.

Truth leads to peace. Here are some comforting verses:

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear…”
Psalm 46:1-2

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:6-7

Greg Laurie, pastor of Harvest Church in California posted a meme on Facebook recently:

“Turn your panic into PRAYER, turn your worry into WORSHIP, turn your fear into FAITH.”

4) Be the church.

A building is not “the church,” we are. The people who go to church can “be the church” to those in need at such a time as this.

Ask your family members, friends, neighbors, church family, and others if they need anything. You can drop off items on their doorstep to keep your social distance.

Donate to food banks (by drive-up, if possible). Keep giving to your church and other ministries (online or send a check in the mail).

Find creative ways to help others. As Christ-followers, we can be a light in a dark world. We can bring hope to the hopeless. And be a helping hand to those in need.

Lead with love. Love your family—even when they’re hard to handle. Love your friends, even though you may not see them as often now. Love changes everything.

5) Use your time wisely.

Spending more time at home can be both a challenge and an opportunity.

If you find that you have more time on your hands in this season, consider how you will use it. Maybe you need to catch up on rest. Or, start writing that book you’ve always wanted to write. Playing music, reading, and maybe even learning to cook with YouTube videos can help pass the time.

Since many nursing homes and assisted living facilities are on lockdown and they cannot have visitors in person right now, you could write a senior a card or letter. Like, a real snail-mail letter.

I heard that during another pandemic, the 1665 Plague of London, Sir Isaac Newton invented calculus. No pressure to invent something, but it made me think that this time away from other distractions could very well produce some good and creative things.

Here’s a great resource for those of you who want to watch helpful, biblical teaching videos on things relating to dating, sex, love and relationships. Author and speaker Brian Kluth has a free resource on those topics, “God’s Road Map for Single and Single-Again Adults.”

6) Get perspective.

Dr. James Dobson offers these wise and comforting words of hope on the coronavirus outbreak. You’ll definitely want to read that.

During this time of change and crisis, you may have to “do without” for a time. Do without hugs when you can’t visit those you love. Do without going out to eat or to movies or watch sports. For some, sadly, it’s doing without an income, not just paper goods or cleaning supplies. (And we can pray for those in need.)

Hopefully, that will lead to a greater appreciation for the people and things you do have. During this time of isolation and closures, choose gratitude. Gratitude leads to joy.

Finally, I believe that this time of virus and isolating will end. It will not last forever. And we will be stronger because of it.

In the meantime:

Stay calm.

Trust God.

And, wash your hands.

Prayer

“Lord, we ask for your help and healing in this time of uncertainty. Please stop the spread of this coronavirus (COVID-19) around the world. Help it to cease soon! Help those who are sick to heal. Help the first responders and medical professionals to stay safe and healthy as they treat others. Provide the supplies they need. And a cure. Be with those who are working at home or in the workplace to be productive, and not feel isolated or lonely. Help us all to stay healthy and keep our eyes on You, not the changing circumstances around us. May we be strong and better people for this, and may this virus crisis end soon. We trust in your goodness and faithfulness. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.”

Drop me a line below. How are you handling “more time at home” while people are isolating because of the coronavirus (COVID-19)?

RESOURCES

For more hope and inspiration, check out these books by Jackie M. Johnson:

Praying with Power When Life Gets Tough
Power Prayers for Women
Prayers with Purpose for Women

Photo credit: bongkarn thanyakij from Pexels

Hard Day? Help is Just a Prayer Away

So you’re having a hard day, or a challenging life. It seems like one thing after another has got you down.

Maybe you’re stressed because there’s so much to do and never enough time.

Maybe you don’t like your job—or you don’t even have one.

Maybe you’re exhausted trying to balance work and family and the demands of life pulling at you from all sides.

You want life to be different—better. And, often you wonder how anything is ever going to change. You need strength and courage to keep on going.

You need hope.

The good news is that help is just a prayer away. The One who loves you most is always here. God is ready to listen, to love you and work His will in your life.

Prayer starts with talking with God—and listening. Any place. Any time.

Remember what God has done in the past—the ways He’s helped you before. Looking back can give you hope for what He will do for you today and in the future.

Psalm 68:28 reminds us, “Summon your power, God; show us your strength, our God, as you have done before.”

Ask God what He has for you today. How does God want you to best serve Him today, in this season of your life?

Prayer doesn’t have to be a duty; it can be a delight as you come to know more fully the One with whom you converse. He loves and accepts you. He listens and He cares. He wants the best for you, so you can speak openly and honestly from your heart.

Powerful prayers don’t necessarily have to be long and involved, but heartfelt and sincere.

An effective prayer can be a simple prayer. Preacher and scholar George A. Buttrick once said, “Prayer is listening as well as speaking, receiving as well as asking; and its deepest mood is friendship, held in reverence.”

Your own personal “happy hour,” your quiet time with God, can be a connecting time as you get to know Him more. As you do, you will come to deeper depths of awe at His wonder, worship at His majesty, and acceptance of His never-ending love.

Often we want answers, but first He wants us to want Him—to connect in a mutual, enjoyable relationship.

Believe that God will provide for you. He knows why you’re here, even when you don’t. He created you with a mind to think and reason, with skills and abilities, and with passions and desires.

God wants you to fulfill your heart’s desires and callings too. It’s never too late to begin anew.

God will fulfill His purposes through you. One day, maybe soon, things will turn around.

Press in. Pray on. And keep your eyes open for your answered prayer.